8 December 2007

Diet Day 1

I was going to write something about the return from the dead of John Darwin but after looking through the various news papers and web sites I think his resurrection has and is being covered rather well and fully in other forms of the media, all I will say on the subject is I think this has came to light because of a "lovers tiff". Lets look at the evidence. Financially failing business, debts growing and growing so Mr Darwin does what every one would do, runs away from it all. Some month later his wife thinking he is dead cashes in his life policy. The wonderer returns and so on as covered in many news papers. now a month or so back they argue and Mrs Darwin does or says something, Mr Darwin is tired of a life in hiding so walks into a police station and says "I believe I am a missing person", but Mr Officer police person I cant remember anything cos I have lost my memory. Lost all sense of reality if you ask me, I think this is a spite thing, Mr Darwin has dropped both himself and his wife in the crap by turning up. Now the world, his family and the police know he is alive and "well", dropping Mrs Darwin deap in it. Anyway changing the subject swiftly...

I have been on the sick from work now for nearly two weeks because of stomach problems, I am going to the hospital on Tuesday to get a camera put inside me to check if there is anything there that is causing the cramps. So anyway I got a letter from the hospital last week telling me what will happen and that for the three days before the operation I need to follow a diet to clear out my stomach and my intestines. Seven days before the appointment I had to stop taking Aspirin (not that I take it) and all iron supplements. Three days before the appointment (Today) I stop taking any fibre products and "can eat freely of any food As long as it is part of the diet below". If it is not in the list I can not eat it.

No milk in any form. (NO PIZZA!!)

Meat: Lean meat, example chicken, turkey, beef, ham and rabbit. Fish: White fish only (Do not fry) Eggs: Boiled, poached, scrambled only (no milk to be used). Veg: Potatoes (hehe only no milk again) Cereals: Spagetti, macaroni, rice, pasta, boiled only, no whole meal. Bread: White only. Drinks: Tea, coffee (no milk) fruit squash (no fresh fruit juice) Marmite, oxo, soda water, mineral water. Fats: 1oz of margarine or butter per day. Other: Plain jelly, rich tea biscuits, honey, golden syrup, white sugar, sweetners, salt.

Day 2 of the diet is going to be the same as today except for 10:00 pm when I have to take 4 Senokot tablets. Then on the day before my appointment I need to "make sure I am near a toilet" (oh boy, I wonder why?) Oh now I see why... 07:30 am: Dissolve the first sachet of Picolax in 1 pint of water and drink........ remove all obstacles and obstructions between were ever I am and the toilet. 08:00 am: eat a good breakfast from the diet plan. No more food can be eaten from this time untill after my appointment (PIZZA?). 03:00 pm Take take second sachet of Picolax, drink plenty of fluids to ensure I dont dehydrate. After the appointment I need to follow a gluten free diet for about 2 weeks then back off to the doctors for a blood test, after all of this they "should" be able to tell what if anything is wrong with me, if they find nothing then it is Irritable bowel syndrome.


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I have it so good..

Let me give you a quick update before I start, trying he kitchen? It's still being put together, we just need the kitchen units fastened...